AN OPEN LETTER

I have been very angry lately. So much so that I have taken bouts of time away just to keep from erupting. There is nothing wrong with anger, or being angry, but when it consumes you to the point you feel you may explode and beat the shit out of idiots around you, you give yourself a time out. Or at least I do.

The most common cause for my frustration and anger has been idiots. Idiots, morons, assholes, numbnuts, you get the picture. I cannot stand the self righteous posturing and spewing of hatred and hypocrisy that has consumed our media these past months.

At every turn, some Fox news twerp is spouting slanted bullshit stats or facts (however fact is not something a Fox employee has ever met) as they try to sway the nation toward good Christian conservatism. Never mind that conservative politics and true Christianity cancel each other out. They cannot co-exist. They are too opposite. It is matter and anti-matter, for fellow geeks out there.

Between the obviously biased and bought off fake news asshats and the political morons we have out there, constantly spewing hate and trying to keep us all so riled up we can't think without going into a rage, as our nation weakens and falls apart, as these bastards pick up their bribes and payoffs, I feel sicker and angrier until I think my head will pop.

They do this to us in attempt to control us. If we are trying to tear each other apart then maybe, just maybe, we won't see them for the dirty, cowardly thieves that are destroying our country. Not to mention fucking up other nations under our flags of truce and good neighbors. Bullshit!

Awhile back, I received a letter from my Congressman, urging me to keep supporting the good cause, help keep the party strong. This was a GOP asshat and I laughed so hard I hurt, then the anger rose up. This bastard sent out a letter marked urgent, then demanded I answer a questionaire under penalty of some sort or the other. Then the SOB called my unlisted number to mooch money. I told them NO and hung up on them. They called again. I have never given the GOP a cent, nor will I ever. Have they not stolen enough from me already? Have they not ignored my voice? Have these wrinkled old farts not done enough damage already? To ALL of us?

As a political party, they are in their death throes, thank all the Gods! When you are so delusional that you become the party of rape should be downgraded to a misdemeanor, that if a child fights back against an attacker she is suddenly the aggressor, then what the hell can you offer me? I am a woman, a polytheistic Pagan, not one of your pseudo-Christian republican twats. I have a brain, I can think for myself. I do not need a man to tell me what to do or to think. I have been in a solid, good relationship with the same person for nearly twenty years. We work together as a team, we support and protect and love each other. What can these bozos offer either of us? They want to strip away all the support nets for the most fragile in our nation, while raking in huge paychecks, contributions, fees and yes, bribes.

I don't need some old guy who is soooo ancient he looks more like the tootsie roll tootsie pop turtle than a man, telling me that if I get raped and wind up pregnant it is my own fault and I cannot abort the fetus. Not while he and his cohorts are forcing us to pay for their Cadillac health care (damn entitlement whores they are!) and are getting free Viagra to keep up their limp dicks for the boys they claim to not be interested in.

These bastards are pushing NRA and guns on us, while trying to lessen the gun control laws that are in place.  They seem to think this will endear them to people, but people who have lost loved ones over shootings by crazy folks with no business owning guns are not okay with this. It is pretty obvious that lobbyists and exchanges of money--very large sums of money-- are behind this idiocy.

Every time of these legalized criminals speaks of family values, traditional values, God or love of God, I try hard not to throw up. These people know nothing of God. They profess to being Christian but hold none of Christ's teaching to heart. They are the wolves in sheep's clothing come to devour us all. They are crazed with greed, gluttony, lust, sloth, wrath, pride and envy. Many have violated the Ten Commandments just as easily as they have violated our Constitution. They claim to love this nation, yet ship our jobs to China. They say they care for the poor and hungry as they take food from the mouths of the truly hungry. All the while they are getting free meals, free health care, free paid vacations, paid sick days, etc., These are our welfare whores, our entitlement junkies. How dare they turn their nose up at the 47%? Who the fuck do they think they are? Posturing and preening with their spray on cheetos tans and their fancy suits and smug ass smirks? Without us, they would have exactly what they deserve: NOTHING!

So they are a part of what makes me so angry that I am fighting against vomiting my guts up as I struggle to not beat the shit out of them or their stupid flunkies. Every day I hear some dick weasel bitching about "Obummer" I want to bury my steeltoed work boot up his ass. We were all told honor the Bush-whacker, respect the Bush-whacker and his questionably sane Cheney. It did not matter that they committed atrocities or war crimes or violated the laws of this land. They were playing God in the White House and destroying our nation. A truer evil has never lived in the White House than those two godless soulless morons. But now, at every turn the very people demanding respect for Bush's position shit on our duly elected president, attacking and insulting and slandering. They claim to be Christians but they are not. They too are soulless, godless morons bleating out what their masters tell them to bleat.

Another thing that stirs up the anger are the idiots that keep pushing for prayer in schools and the pledge of allegiance. I have no problem if someone wishes to pray, but do not force everyone to join you in your prayer. It is wrong! It is un-Constitutional. It is also immoral and unethical. As for the pledge, I laugh. That damn thing was a campaign to sell flags! It is not real, it is not part of any government or patriotic anything. It is as meaningful as pledging to your Swiffer.

While on the topic of prayer and religion, did you know that we pagans are lumped in with Satanists? That we do not get tax breaks Christians do? That as long as we are not recognized by a tax exempt status we are considered not real? That we do not technically exist? That Christians (or politicians pretending to be) are stealing our rights as we speak? While I personally do not need tax exempt status, as my spirituality cannot be bought or sold, I still rankle at the slight. Especially as former Pres. Reagan violated the Constitution while in office by declaring (was it 1984 or 1985) as year of the Bible? That he claimed the Bible was the word of God and that was that. What an idiot. The Bible has seen more rewrites than a Hollywood script! Also Jesse Helms was the asshole lumping us in with Satanists. We don't even believe in Satan! He is purely a Christian construct and concept.

Lies We Are Told: Lie # 1:Your Heritage

I can clearly remember being told to lie about my race, my ethnicity if you will, at a very young age. As a small child in the 60's my mother used to remind me to never mention that I was part German. It was hammered in to my head that if I said a word about my German heritage I could be tortured or killed. I was told to always cling to my Irish roots and flat out deny my German ancestry. As a child I felt that I was being asked to do something terribly wrong. The church that I was occasionally dragged to said lying was wrong, it was a sin. But I was told to lie, to lie lie lie in spite of it.

At the time we were in Fort Smith, Arkansas, and I was told that anti-German sentiment was rampant (of course my mother was far more crude with her wording) but it scared me. Because of something I did not understand as a toddler or slightly older than a toddler, I could be hurt badly. Or killed.

For good measure I was always told to omit that we had black ties as well. African American was not a common term back then. Negro and then black were the more common terms. Again, I did not see the harm. Why was I being asked to lie? To hide a part of who I was? I saw no difference in black or white; I saw no one facet of my lineage as better or worse than any other. It was confusing and hurtful. I was being told that I should feel shame for something that was not shameful, and guilt for something that had no guilt.

That feeling of having to hide followed me through the years, it is still with me today in part due to the behavior I was forced to adhere to and then the after effects of the truth coming out.

One day, as I was out swimming with friends in a secluded pond, we met an older couple who remarked on my obvious German blood. I automatically threw out that I was Irish. They laughed and said Yes, but the German shows more. The eyes, the hair, the skin---you are so obviously German! At the ripe old age of 17 I nearly panicked. The older couple told me to not worry. They said they understood my mother's fear, as in the 60's there was still pockets of anti-German haters who were a threat. Especially in less cultured areas of the country.

It was a breath of fresh air. I could admit my German roots and not be struck down dead. Over time, I discovered that so many people out there easily noted the difference between German and Nazi. As I had nothing to do with the party of hate or oppression, I was okay.

For the record, I am not ashamed of any aspect of my heritage or being. I figure my ancestors found someone to love and have a family with and their race or color was truly irrelevant. As for anyone curious on the matter, here goes! I am Irish, German, English, (possiblt\y Scottish), Native American (Cherokee, Choctaw, Blackfoot, Mohawk) African American, Black Dutch and Dutch. I'm very mixed. I am an American woman. I am unique. I am me. There is not a damn thing wrong with that.

The Church and Cats: An Ugly Secret

While doing some research on cats and their significance in history, I ran across an appalling find.  In the Dark Ages the Church made its hatred of cats known as they sanctioned the torture and slaughter of thousands upon thousands of cats. The Church demonized these poor animals and took joy in their destruction.

This coming out of people who were supposed to be Christian? Who were supposed to be holy? Who were deliberately lying to people and following their own selfish whims rather than the Will of God? These are the people who took it upon themselves to demonize one of God's creations. Not very holy. Not very Christian. Actually, they were quite evil.

If you think this did not really cause much of a problem, you would be wrong. The Church's violence against cats led to an explosion in the population of rats and mice, which led to the Black Plague which wiped out much of Europe. If you want exact numbers, go read your history. Some estimates claimed one third of the human population others claimed nearly half of the people in Europe lost their lives. Either way you go, the Church was guilty of murdering thousands upon thousands of humans.

Did the Church take responsibilty for their crimes? No. No more than they do today when their priests rape children. Can someone explain to me the hatred against gays when the priests are sodomizing young boys? They hate homosexuality and yet they perform homosexual acts upon unwilling children! My opinion: these evil corrupt bastards should be ex-communicated and imprisoned or executed.

Let us not forget the castrati, young males who were castrated to maintain their smooth falsetto for the church's choirs. This was not done with consent, but forced upon young males so they would serve the Church.

The Church itself has been a bastion of evil for as far back as recorded history. The Church led the attack on witches, in attempt to squash the competition and to steal property.  The Bible has been rewritten to reflect the Church's desires, omitting God's Will.

The word witch or wicca (which is pronounced witch-ah not wikka) roughly translates into wise. These people were the healers, the doctors, the shamans who cured the sick and healed the injured. Their knowledge of plants and herbs was phenomenal, as well as their understanding of how the human body worked.

The Church did not want them around, as these wise people could do more for the sick than the Church could. For a small donation the Church would pray for you. But no one wanted to pay for that, so the Church launched an assault on these wise folk to wipe them out as they had attempted to wipe out the cats.

The Church has long held a position of power through violence and murder. During this same period, they were known to have their own Assassins. They set these Church Assassins upon their foes. One of their biggest mistakes was in sending Assassins after a fellow priest who had discovered their dirty secrets. His writings survive to this day, telling of his terror and knowing his time was short. His writings were found hidden beneath the altar of the Church he belonged to. And yes, they murdered one of their own.

I am in no way attacking REAL Christians. They would have no part of this debauchery and filth. The Evangelical movement espouses so much of the hatred, cruelty and judgement of the Church, having nothing to do with true Christians or Christianity. I feel that these points need to be made, that ignoring them do no good for anyone. I do have friends of Christian faith, as well as many other faiths, and they too are appalled by what passes as Christianity especially here in the U.S.

There is also a movement called Thelema which is connected to the Church, although they often deny it. Thelemetics are those who practice magic and use the Christian pantheon, while condemning the rest of us magic users as witches. Thelema, in a nutshell, means magic users who are Christian. Their basic goal is to draw Christians and Wiccans, as well as other faiths, under one BIG umbrella religion. In some of their writings they brag of the intent to bury all religions but Thelema. Sad thing is, these folks are NOT Christian. They are merely Church puppets out to further empower the Church. It has long been whispered that the holy Roman Church intends to take over the world, to form a world wide theocracy. However, they are not strong enough to do that. In the meantime, we DO have a problem with Evangelical quasi-Christian groups pushing in to all facets of our lives, threatening our rights and our freedoms. They are the vocal minority trying to make us believe they are the majority. We need to expose these charlatans and claeanse our politics and communities of their hateful influences so we may all live in harmony.

Also, a final disturbing note: if you access the records of criminals, where children or animals are tortured you will find the common thread in over 90% of the cases are White male, 20's to 30's, middle class, Christian.

And, bear in mind, these pro-lifers like Sarah Palin, for one galling example, are gung ho to slaughter wolves, polar bears, foxes and more. Where is this respect for life? Where is this compassion? Where is the respect and responsibility of one supposed to shepherd and safe guard God's creation?

To this day, when you come across someone spewing hatred toward cats and threatening to torture or slay them, it is usually one of these fake ass Christians. They are still following the guidelines of their corrupt Church. The hate is still there, the murder is still there, the evil intent to destroy has not died.

St. Jerome

Did you know that in the fourth century C.E. St. Jerome deliberately mistranslated the Bible to condemn the practice of observing dreams? Before that time, it was considered one of the ways God contacted people, as well as ways in which guidance was given. Prophetic dreams were not considered unusual or out of the norm. Yet St. Jerome took it upon himself to outright lie and mislead. 

Did he not believe in the warning to those who would take away or add to the Bible? Was not their punishment to be in equal measure to their crime?

So, here we have a man who was granted sainthood, who was willfully and deliberately leading people away from the teachings of the Bible in effort to control the people.

With this kind of history how can any one trust what lies between the covers of that book? The Church has shown itself capable and willing to go against, what they claimed was the word of God and the will of God, so that they might control more fully.

In the past, Kings also held sway and their will was often far reaching, coloring laws and beliefs of the people. Can we say for certain that the Church did not rewrite more of this supposedly sacred book, to meet with the current King's approval Or to fit the current Pope's whims?

Aleister Crowley

In the Pagan and Wiccan communities you often hear the name Aleister Crowley touted as being the father of the  wiccan or pagan moveent. Having done years of research on him, I found him to be an abysmal inhuman bastard. This is the man who twisted so much of what was out there, at the time, to suit his own perverted whims.

It was Crowley who was run out of towns and countries for his cruelties and perversions. One of these perversions that I hold a deep hatred for, is the torture and ritualistic sacrifice of cats, as well as the ritualistic drinking of their blood. Some of his sicko followers died from drinking cat blood and to that I say good riddance!

This man was not only insane, he was fucking evil! You cannot proclaim a path of love, light or balance when you are torturing any living creature.

His sickness is possibly the root of the animal tortures and sacrifices we see today that horrifies and sickens.

To any who claim this vile being has done any good for us, I say go fuck yourself. Crowley was a twisted monster in human skin.

A Little Obscure History of the Pentagram

Did you know that the Church used to use the pentagram? They used to mark shields, cloaks and other items with this symbol. Some sources have claimed that the knights of the Crusades wore pentagrams on garments and weapons or shields. This is because the pentagram is seen as a protective symbol.

From what I understand of history, those Knights of the Crusades were not a goodly bunch. They were blood thirsty rapists, murderers, torturers and thieves. When the Church could no longer control these savages, they sent them far away to ruin other nations' lives and peoples.

I have reason the believe the Church dropped its use of the pentagram around that time, allowing it to take on a negative meaning as they distanced themselves from their Knights. This made it a lot easier to claim people still using it for its original protective influences were evil or were witches doing the devil's works.

Witches and pagans often use this symbol, or wear a piece of jewelry that is fashioned into a pentagram. Even now, in 2013 there are those who see this as a sign of evil.

I Cannot Remain Quiet

First off, let me say that I have friends who are Christian, Pagan, Wiccan, Agnostic, Muslim, Atheist, etcetera. I often feel the need to preface my words with "But I don't mean all..."  Too often we see and respond with blanket statements. I would like to clarify that when I say so and so this or that I do not mean all of them do.

In the wake of the Supreme Court's decision to recognize same sex marriage, I have seen and heard so much hatred coming out of so called Christians that it makes me sick. Mainly, it is the self important, self righteous evangelical movement that spews the most vitriolic hate.

This is not Christian.

Christians--true ones--follow the laws set down in their Bible. They do not twist commands or words to fit their whims. They are told Judge not lest ye be judged. They do not judge. They are told to not bear false witness, so they do not lie. They are told to not covet, nor be envious, and they abide these commands. When they are told to love the sinner but hate the sin they comply.

The hatred spewing from the mouths of so called good Christians, good family value loving Republicans, galls me. Some go so far as to say that all liberals, gays, witches, pagans--any one who does not believe as they do, talk as they do, walk as they do--should be dragged out of their homes and shot dead or be put in concentration camps bothers me. This is not the mark of a real Christian.

The Bible, that they claim to put so much stock in tells them to Obey the law of the land, as well as to render unto Ceasar what was Caesar's. By trying to thwart and force laws to their liking they are in fact not obeying the laws of the land. By attempting to squirm out of paying their fair share in taxes they are subverting giving Caesar (or government) what is its rightful due.

When you take something that you are not entitled to, you are a thief. The Bible says thou shall not steal. When business owners wheedle around and get free health care, be it for low income, Indian health care, etcetra when they are making more money than their employees (while denying such benefits or opportunities to said employees) it is shameful, it is theft and it is not Christian.

To take advantage of the poor, the vulnerable, the ill or disabled, while outright stealing resources is a crime ! This kind of thing, which is entitlement abuse needs to be stopped. It needs to be reported. Some of these very violators have complained that people on disability were milking the system, they should lose their checks and be forced to work. Those people they bitched about had health issues such as heart problems, stress disorders and terminal cancer. But these holier than thou fascist wanna be's would take away from those entitled and deserving to put more in their own pockets. Shameful! How dare you call yourselves Christians?

To call oneself a Christian comes with responsibility! You cannot say the words and skate on by. You must live the life, you must have Christ in your life. Christ would not have taken from the needy to give to the rich, he was not bloody Robin Hood in reverse! He taught love, compassion, acceptance. He did not preach hatred nor bigotry.

The Bible also speaks out against vanity, sloth, gluttony, pride, arrogance and much more. But how many of these Christians do you see setting up hair appointments, mani-pedi sessions, massages because they are so stressed out? Too often this accompanies someone of well over 300 pounds! Of course you feel stress you are killing you body, destroying your temple, your holy vessel!

Christ was about fairness, second chances and forgiveness.

How can these hate filled bile spewers claim to be a Christian--a follower of Christ and his teachings--when they deny everything he stood for?

To attempt to deny fellow human beings, fellow citizens, the rights you enjoy is just plain evil. Seeking a better life, seeking happiness, seeking love--these are things we pride ourselves for in America. But our fellow Americans do not see those who are different as equal, deserving or even human.

Gay and lesbian Americans are still Americans. They have rights, they pay taxes, they go to war to fight and die for what our politicians want them to fight and die for. It is not right that they should be denied equal and fair treatment.

It is my personal belief that those most homophobic in this country are scared shitless that they might be--gasp--attracted to a member of the same sex! If you don't like the thought of being gay, then don't be! It isn't really like it is a choice because it isn't. It is something you are born as, not something you choose to be to piss people off. Being gay or lesbian is no different than being born with blue eyes or brown hair. It is a part of who you are. You cannot pray the gay away, to think that you can is simply moronic. You can't fix what does not need to be fixed!

So for all you hate filled bigots out there, how about you look in the mirror before you blast your bullshit hypocrisy at others? Before you condemn that gay man or lesbian, how about you fix what is wrong with you? If you are spewing hate and condemning others, how about you remember that you are not God and should not be trying to do his work! Lose that 200 extra pounds you are insulating your hollow soul with. Stop looking outside at what is wrong with them and fix what is wrong with you!

You haters make me sick! You narrow minded douchey little bigots need to shut the fuck up. My grandmother was a devout, compassionate Christian, not a whiney self serving evangelical. She practiced love, understanding and compassion. You guys make me ashamed to be on the same planet with you. I find it embarrassing that a card carrying High Priestess and follow of Anubis has to sit here and tell you what your Bible says because you clearly don't know it yourselves.

Crone

I am at the start of what some pagans and many wiccans call the Crone stage. It typically means you are between 50-55, some say older, but the accepted age starts at 50. So many people think that life ends once you are past your 40's but that isn't the case for many people today. I have very much been looking forward to this phase in life when you are less uncertain, know yourself, your path, your deities in ways you could not at 20 or 30 or 40. There is a calm and a confidence that comes with age. The things you have in youth may wane somewhat but the benefit of age is wisdom and understanding.

There are three stages of woman that tie in with the Goddess: Maiden, Mother and Crone. We see these aspects in our Triple Goddess and embrace her throughout our lives as she shines light on us through each challenge, each test, each victory and even during our failures.

The Maiden phase is just as it sounds. It is the dewy youth of new beginnings and first loves, of awakenings and new knowledge.

The Mother phase is when we embrace our blessed powers of creation as we birth our children and draw closer to our families. This phase is one of nurturing and maturing.

Then we come to The Crone phase. This is when we teach others, share what we have learned and help our communities to grow stronger, more sure, as our age brings insight and wisdom.

These are very brief descriptives of the three phases, but they are enough to give you an idea of what they are. More than being pagan or wiccan, I think they teach modern women to embrace the changes and phases within their lives, empowering them to be strong and intelligent brave people.

When I was called on to teach quite some years ago, I bucked against it. But the pleading and cajoling pushed me to attempt it, even as I knew my temprament was not suited to teaching.

Those early students complained and bitched that I was not what they wanted, even as they devoured my energy, time and patience. It did not take long until I dismissed them, as each time the pushiest of the lot were also the least willing to study, work or learn. Some went so far as to beg for a cheat sheet. It angered them that there was no short cut. There never is.

They did not want to put forth an ounce of effort, but attempted to eat away at my time, wanting to gain access to rites, rituals, spells and information that was far too advanced for them. Never mind that they tried to get their hands on my personal, very private Book of Shadows. That is not the behavior of a true student, nor is that the kind of relationship that should exist between teacher-student.

Those experiences taught me well. I learned to hand pick my students, choosing only the ones who truly seek our ways and want to learn. Those who pursue or push or make demands are denied. I refuse to waste my time again.

I test potential students thoroughly, for both our sakes, and tell them this will be the case up front. Those who do not want to be tested leave, those who wish to learn remain. As I do not charge, I feel it is only fair that my time not be dwindled away by someone wanting to play at being a pagan or wiccan. This is a way of life, it is not a game. If you want to play then find yourself an MMORPG.

Over the years I have worked with many deities and many spirits, so much so that I am never without the support a coven grants, even during times my physical coven is not available. I have also worked with other magic users online to heal and strengthen others. These are things I was not so at ease with in the earlier days. Back then I often felt alone or inadequate as I groped my way along this path. Time, and age have brought ease and understanding, the knowledge that all I must do is call on my deities and ask their help. No more fears, no more uncertainties, no more feeling alone or inadequate.

Now, as I enter the Crone phase, I take my time to put some of my personal experiences in to a book that will hopefully help young would-be-pagans on their path. This is one way that I can inform and teach, shedding some light on the mysteries and half truths that abound out there. It is my desire to answer those probing questions as well as taking away the fear of the unknown.

I will be updating soon, with info on how to find my book. Its release date is very near.

Until Next Time,
Jade

First Post: Introduction

Hello and welcome to my blog, Jaded. I'm Jade and this is my spot for hanging out, making posts about my work, my books and just making random comments on life in general.

First off, I guess I should tell you a little bit about myself, eh? I hate talking about myself, and find it far easier to talk about my beliefs, my path, as they seem to take away that sense of unease. I was brought up to believe that over sharing or talking about yourself was an act of vanity (especially for girls), so it is really hard to self promote! I'm working on it though.

I am a Pagan (not a Wiccan), which means a polytheist who acknowledges both a male and a female divinity. Pagan means country dweller, or one who follows the old ways. It does not mean heathen. A heathen is one who has no god(s) nor belief in them. I became a Priestess in the 1990's and in 1999 became a High Priestess or HPS. Being a HPS simply means having the know-how and skills to conduct the rites of a coven. Yes, I am a member of a coven, and yes I do head my own coven.

I became interested in the paranormal, the occult, all things supposedly secretive and mysterious, because in a nutshell I was a curious kid. The church my mother occasionally dragged me off to was big on telling you to sit down and shut up. The young had no business being curious or in asking questions. If you were a girl, especially, you were to sit silently for hours on end, with a smile on your face. Boys were given much more leeway. Disillusionment came at an early age, as I was told so often to "take it on faith". That seemed to be the go to response, until I finally kept quiet and stopped asking questions.

Around age 11 or 12, right about 1973, I came across a small book on Witchcraft and I was fascinated. Some of it creeped me out, and in my gut I knew something was off, but I also recognized a power and a truth in the midst of the babble. That sense of something more stayed with me.

It was around 1985 when I started to seek answers to things I could never get a straight answer on. I poked around discreetly, then after my mother's death (she was dead set against me learning anything she did not approve of, sad to say) I began to study and learn of other options, other paths, other ways of life.

That eventually led me to a part time job and the person who became the love of my life as well as my best friend. With his full support and compassion, I delved deeper into my studies and started to find what I had been seeking my whole life.

Long story short, in those early days I was blessed to meet the Goddess. She was so amazing, so beautiful, so forgiving that all I could do was weep and fall to my knees. I felt so humble, so frail, and yet so loved. It was like nothing I had ever felt before. I came to know her as Hathor later on, but that first impression was of many rolled into one incredible being. She changed my life. She changed my world. She changed me.

Having had very negative experiences in the Christian churches, I grew brave enough, and I must admit angry enough, that I wanted to see these Old Gods, these Pagan Gods for myself. If their female God, the Goddess, was so remarkable, I had to know the other half of this equation. They came to me, as I opened my heart, mind and life to them, at first it was Lugh, then Balder and Anubis. Having always felt drawn to Anubis I was staggered by his compassion, his sense of humor and his need to protect those he saw as his own. These Gods were kind, generous with their time, and so very patient. They began to teach me of the Old Ways and I was eager to learn more.

Yet again, I found acceptance and love, a forgiveness for my failings and weaknesses. I also found no fear of going to this "hell" that Christians are taught to fear. Having accepted the God and the Goddess into my life, my heart, I was no longer on that conveyor belt toward damnation. For once in my life, I was truly spared, saved the horrors, and free of fear.

The journey did not stop there. But this is a good place to wrap this first post.


In Peace,
Jade